A missive on missing your misplaced friends

Yes, ladies and gentlemen, I miss my friends. I miss you all a hell of a lot.

Last night I received a phone call from one of my best friends at varsity, a man who I seldom hear from these days (due to work pressure, from his side, so I don't blame him in the slightest), and who I haven't seen since January. This is a person who I spent four long years with at varsity, where we managed to drink many litres of red wine (after I taught him how to appreciate the stuff...) and whiskey, talk for days on end about anything but work, and had many strange adventures with. Needless to say, I miss good ol' Dave, and if it wasn't for the fact that his mobile phone is broken and he has no internet connection, we would probably still manage to communicate every day. Still, we try our hardest... The problem is, this little scenario has been acting out more and more over the past couple of months. Being the guy at university that outlives everyone is slowly but surely making an impact (Kev, if you're reading this, I now understand what you meant when we talked about this three years ago...).

Most people can predict where this post seems to be going, every single blogger in the universe has written something about how lonely he/she is... Yes, I miss my friends, we've shared some wonderful moments and now they all have jobs and live in different parts of the country (or the world, for that matter...), Yes, I do wish I could hear or see more of them. Yes, I wish they'd actually all still be at varsity. But, I will not write this to guilt-trip them into phoning or mailing me more, or trying to visit me, or anything like that. I am not such a selfish person. All of them are doing what they are doing because they have to (or want to) do it, because they have goals that must (and will) be attained. I try not to judge my friends, and I like to think they've always extended me that courtesy as well. So, I have decided to write this silly little guide to what you should do when you miss your friends...

First off, remember that these people, if they truly are your friends, are thinking of you, and will try their darndest to stay in touch. If that means a phonecall once in a while, a weekly message, or just an online diary so that people can read what's going on in their lives, at least it's an effort. Some will have the chance to do more, others won't. Accept it. The fact that they try means they haven't forgotten you yet, and probably won't either. Remember, these people probably miss you as much as you miss them...

Second, you will see these people again. Most of the people who go abroad tend to come back, or at least tend to visit on an annual basis. The people in the country are never more than a couple of hours away, be it by car or plane. And everytime you do actually get to see these people, the reunion is so much sweeter and more fun. Plus, one day when we can finally travel via teleportation without being turned into Jeff Goldblum, no one will ever have to worry about the distance of loved ones ever again.

Third, don't be a hypocrite. It's not like you're currently sitting in the middle of the Antarctic manning a weather station. You do have friends around at you at any given time who you can always spend more time with. Think about this: next year, or whenever you leave university, and all your younger friends are still around, you'll be in exactly the same shoes as the people who left before you. How would you like it if these people constantly guilt-trip you for your attention?

Fourth, when people do visit you or get in touch, make the most of the situation... Talk too much, drink too much, make sure you/they leave with at least another two or three stories to tell your grandchildren (once they're older...) about.

Fifth, there is no fifth!!! I'm not bloody Dr. Phil! I don't have all the answers! If I had I wouldn't write them on a blog but in a book so I can get millions in royalties and then visit you all!

Guys, I miss you, and hope you're all doing well. Hope you still have a great time, take care, and come back anytime (and everytime) you get the chance!

Right, so a special themed 'Of the day' for us all...

Music Lyric of the day: "If life is just a highway, and the soul is just a car, then objects in the rearview mirror may appear closer than they are" (Meat Loaf, Objects in the rearview mirror may appear closer than they are)

Arb 80's Trivia of the day: According to Forbes magazine, Cabbage Patch Kids were the most popular toys sold in the 80's. They also had so-called 'evil twins', the Garbage Pail kids (they weren't evil, just filthier), who even got their own TV show and movie. Weird.

Suggestion of the day: Never be ashamed of watching childish, cheesy movies and tv shows, or playing games from your youth. There's nothing wrong with reliving your childhood. I do it at least once a month, it helps keep me sane.

Quote of the day: "Performance enhancing drugs are banned in the Olympics. Ok, we can swing with that. But performance debilitating drugs should not be banned. Smoke a joint and win the hundred meters, fair play to you. That's pretty damn good. Unless someone's dangling a Mars bar off in the distance." - Eddie Izzard

OK, so maybe it didn't have a theme after all... Until next week!